I prayed as a 15years old young girl not to have a son because I was scared and saddened at the several nights my mum would stay awake to pray with teary eyes for my brothers. My father was only very active at locking out of the house any offending child; he had no relationship with either my mother or the children. I hated my father for this although I have come to love him now that I understand his past.
My paternal grandfather had three wives and too many children.
My father was the fifth of six sons from his mother. He had no family love or relationships; he does not eat his mother food because it may have been poisoned before he reaches his plate. My father never knew love or how to show love.
Thankfully God blessed me with two sons (20 and 16years) and a daughter (19years), the experiences of being a mother to them has shaped my life. My husband had great bond with his sons when they were young but he had to learn how to take the relationship to the next level when they turned teenagers. There is so much the men need to learn about raising their sons into men, a boy-father relationship is critical.
The next questions are: What will our husbands and fathers teach their sons about relationships with the opposite sex: How will men explain to their sons ‘who a real man is’: What is their opinion about extra marital affairs? What will they teach their sons?
Today I see a ‘Big Rush’ to close the yearning gap in gender inequality hence we have global supports for the girl child, Awareness for Girl Rights, Empowerment for women and girls, Child and Sex abuse law for Girls, International Day of the Girl Child etc.
These are all for The Girl Child but how about The Boy Child? Who is the Boy Child? What are his needs? What are or ought to be the values of Nigerian Boy Child? We should also as parents, fathers, mothers, charity organizations, bloggers, government start to focus on and raise awareness for him.
All of these questions and impending answers are important in order to create an appropriate MATCH for the girl child whom we have groomed with much invested time, money and expectations.