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Remarriage after a spouses death: How soon is too soon?

After having been married, possibly for many years, and going through the trauma and grief that comes with the death of a spouse, widows and widowers may find dating daunting. When is the right time to start dating again? How often should one talk about one’s late spouse? Should one date exclusively or date several people at the same time, and should it be casual or serious? There are many right answers to these questions, and it all comes down to what makes the widow or widower comfortable. Even when expected, the death of a partner is a shocking heartbreak. Weathering the waves of sadness and building a new life without your mate  may pose the biggest challenge you’ve ever faced. One day, however — trust me on this — the will to live fully again, and even experience companionship, will arise. You’ll be intimidated at first, of course. It’s hard to throw yourself back in the dating game after 30, 40 years or more. But the pointers  below can help ease your pre-game jitters. wedding-couple
  1. Purge the guilt. Your partner would want you to be happy again, so banish the notion that you are somehow “betraying” him or her by seeing someone new. I tell those I counsel to look at it this way: Cherish your old relationship, but don’t let it sabotage your prospects of forging a new one. And if your feelings of guilt persist, see a counselor; you’ll want to resolve these thoughts before attempting to date again.
 
  1. Tell your story (but carefully). More than merely a widow or widower, you are a person with opinions, hobbies, preferences, accomplishments, social values, political views and a unique way of looking at the world. As you think about how to present your authentic self, be selective about which of those attributes you share right away and which are best kept private until you get to know a new person better. In particular, avoid over-reminiscing about your old life; it may make your new acquaintance feel excluded.
  1. Define your desires. Take some time to think about the type of new bond you’d like to establish. You may long to clone your lost love, but it’s unlikely you’ll ever meet an exact replica of the one you were with. And let’s face it—would you really want to? After all, the person you met at age 25 changed over a lifetime, and so did you. Now you’re in a different stage, with a redrawn horizon. Perhaps you’re ready to see the world and want to find someone who shares your interests. Don’t stop at shared interests, though. Factors that loomed large in the past—good looks, financial success, whatever—may pale in the present as you acknowledge the importance of a partner who is kind and supportive, or one who is funny and entertaining. In short, grant yourself the freedom to gravitate to a whole new kind of person.
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  1. Take stock and retool. If you’ve become a bit casual in the weight, wardrobe or grooming departments, now’s the time to up your game. Visit a salon or barbershop and ask how you could best update your hairstyle. Seek out a clothing consultant or personal shopper — someone who can advise you on a flattering look and help you pick out items to achieve it. Or ask a close friend to be brutally honest about what your ideal makeover would include. And whatever exercise you once enjoyed, try to make it part of your daily routine.
  1. Make a connection. Certain shortcuts are time-tested. The simplest is to ask friends if they know someone you’d enjoy meeting. Don’t be embarrassed — it’s a good beginning. Most people probably won’t think of suggesting this on their own (and if they do, they may hold back for fear of offending you). So actively encourage them to think of you as a single, eligible person.
No one can tell you when you should begin dating after your spouse dies, as that’s an individual decision that will depend on various factors. It's important that you take the time necessary to heal and let yourself feel whole and complete before jumping into a relationship. When you're ready to date, you'll know it. You'll also know how you want your relationships to progress by listening to your heart and trusting your instincts.

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10-year-old rape victim gives birth to baby girl

A 10-year-old rape victim whose plea for an abortion was rejected by India’s Supreme Court has given birth to a baby girl, a doctor said Thursday.

The girl, who cannot be named for legal reasons, was raped several times allegedly by an uncle who has since been arrested. Last month her parents asked the country’s top court to allow her to have a late-term abortion but the request was turned down. Indian law does not allow medical terminations after 20 weeks unless there is a threat to either the life of the mother or her child.“She gave birth through C-section today (Thursday). Both the girl and her baby are doing fine,” doctor Dasari Harish told AFP by phone from the northern Indian city of Chandigarh. “The surgery was uneventful. There were no complications whatsoever. The baby weighed 2.2 kilos (4.8 pounds) and is in the neonatal ICU for now.” The Press Trust of India news agency said the girl was unaware that she had delivered a child and the parents had decided to put the baby up for adoption. Her parents have told her that she had a stone in her stomach and had undergone surgery to remove it, PTI said. India has a grim record of sexual assaults on minors with 20,000 cases of rape or sexual assaults reported in 2015, according to government data.  

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Breaking: Trump sacks Nigeria’s Ogunlesi as adviser

Nigerian born international CEO, Adebayo Ogunlesi has now ceased to be an adviser to embattled US President Donald Trump. Trump sacked him today along with other distinguished CEOs counselling him via two councils on how to “Make America Great Again”. Adebayo Ogunlesi: to advise Trump on the economy Trump sacked Ogunlesi on Twitter, when he announced the dissolution of two business advisory councils, in one fell swoop. Ogunlesi was a member of Strategic and Policy Forum, one of the two disbanded by the unpredictable president. The other group was the Manufacturing Jobs Initiative Council. Ogunlesi, heads Global Infrastructure Partners, a private equity firm and one of Fortune 500 companies. He was the only African on the panel. The New York Times reported before Trump’s tweeted dissolution, that members of Ogunlesi’s panel were debating dissolving the body entirely as Trump wallowed deeper into bigotry quagmire. But Trump preempted their move. “Corporate leaders had hoped that President Trump would help businesses by slashing taxes and gutting regulations. It is not clear how much he will deliver on that score. On top of that, he is putting many chief executives in the position of answering for a president with an unparalleled track record of outraging people, most recently at a contentious press conference on Tuesday when he drew a false equivalence between the white supremacists who protested in Charlottesville, Va., last weekend and counter-protesters.”, NYT reported. ofunleso Trump had earned rebuke and isolation from business leaders for supporting racial bigotry, White Supremacists and the KKK, following his remarks that failed to blame the tragic violence in Charlottesville, Virginia on the group. Instead, he blamed all the sides and the group that challenged the racists. The leaders of three companies — Kenneth Frazier of Merck, Kevin Plank of Under Armour and Brian Krzanich of Intel — were the first to resign from the Manufacturing Jobs Initiative Council. They resigned on Monday because Mr. Trump was slow to condemn the white supremacists during the weekend and blamed “many sides” for the violence. When Trump moderated his tone on Monday by saying “racism is evil” and condemning neo-Nazis, he did not assuage some of the CEOs working with him. Scott Paul, the president of the Alliance for American Manufacturing, an organization backed by the steel industry and the United Steelworkers resigned. he was followed on Tuesday by Richard Trumka and Thea Lee, the president and deputy chief of staff for the union group A.F.L.-C.I.O.. As reported by Vanguard, the latter’s resignation followed Trump’s reversed position at a press conference at Trump Tower in New York, in which he said that “not all of those people were neo-Nazis, believe me,” referring to the white nationalists who were chanting “Jews will not replace us” as they marched with tiki-torches. Ogunlesi’s Strategic Forum, composed some of America’s most highly respected and successful business leaders. Members of the body were expected to meet with Trump frequently to share their specific experience and knowledge as the president implements his plan to bring back jobs and “Make America Great Again. ” The other members of the forum were: Stephen Schwarzman (forum chairman), chairman, CEO, and cofounder of Blackstone Paul Atkins, CEO of Patomak Global Partners, former commissioner of the Securities and Exchange Commission Mary Barra, chairwoman and CEO, General Motors Toby Cosgrove, CEO, Cleveland Clinic Jamie Dimon, chairman and CEO, JPMorgan Chase & Co. Larry Fink, chairman and CEO, BlackRock Bob Iger, chairman and CEO, The Walt Disney Company Rich Lesser, president and CEO, Boston Consulting Group Doug McMillon, president and CEO, Wal-Mart Stores Inc. Jim McNerney, former chairman, president, and CEO of Boeings Ginni Rometty, chairwoman, president, and CEO of IBM Kevin Warsh, Shepard Family Distinguished Visiting Fellow in economics at the Hoover Institute, former member of the Board of Governors of the Federal Reserve System Mark Weinberger, global chairman and CEO, EY Jack Welch, former chairman and CEO, General Electric Daniel Yergin, Pulitzer Prize winner, vice chairman of IHS Markit Apart from being managing partner of Global Infrastructure Partners, Ogunlesi also serves on the boards of Callaway Golf Co. and Kosmos Energy Ltd. At the same time he’s the chairman of Africa Finance Corp. and serves on the boards of various not-for-profits ranging from New York Presbyterian Hospital to the NAACP Legal Defense and Educational Fund, Inc.

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Queen Elizabeth prepares to make Prince Charles King of England

Queen Elizabeth, 92, is reportedly preparing to abdicate the throne and make Prince Charles the King of England, royal sources claim. The sources claim the long-reigning monarch told her inner circle of her plans to hang up her crown at the age of 95 and the wheels are already in motion to aid the transition. "I have spoken to a number of high-ranking courtiers who made it clear that preparations for a transition are moving ahead at pace," royal commentator for the Daily Mail, Robert Jobson, said. "They have all confirmed that a Regency with Charles taking the lead is now, at the very least, a real possibility." There are reports about "Plan Regency" coming into force. It involves a piece of legislation called the Regency Act, although Clarence House is making no comment about it. The act would grant the Queen's eldest son full power to reign even while she still lives. One senior former member of the Royal Household said: "Out of the profound respect the Queen holds for the institution of monarchy and its stewardship, Her Majesty would want to make sure that she has done everything she can for her country and her people before she hands over. She is dutiful to her core. "Her Majesty is mindful of her age and wants to make sure when the time comes, the transition of the Crown is seamless. I understand the Queen has given the matter considerable thought and believes that, if she is still alive at 95, she will seriously consider passing the reign to Charles."

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One-year-old crushed by runaway Range Rover

When accidents happen you just dont understand sometimes how come and how could.
The one-year-old daughter of Paul Black, a former contestant on The Voice, has died after getting crushed by an unattended Range Rover that rolled down a driveway and into a wall.
Paul Black had taken his daughter Pearl Black to a local park on Sunday and they were on their way home when an unoccupied car rolled down a hill at an address in Heolgerrig, Merthyr Tydfil, South Wales, and demolished a wall which fell on Pearl. The toddler was taken to Prince Charles Hospital in Merthyr Tydfil by air ambulance after the incident at 1.39pm on Sunday but died a short time later. Pearl's brother also suffered minor injuries in the accident.
An inquest heard that the car had its handbrake "fully applied". The automatic transmission of the Range Rover was believed to be in park at the time it rolled downhill.
Coroner's officer Gareth Heatley said: "The vehicle had been left parked with the automatic transmission in park and the handbrake fully applied. As the vehicle gained momentum down the driveway it has travelled across the road and on to the footpath opposite, demolishing the boundary wall. That same wall has collapsed. Tragically it fell on to one-year-old Pearl who has been walking on the footpath, causing crush injuries, I am told."
Her parents Paul and Gemma Black paid tribute to the youngster on Monday, saying "she was the reason we all lived".
In a statement released by South Wales Police, they said: "Pearl was every single star in every single sky, she was as bright as the stars, when she looked at you with those eyes and she would melt your heart. She was the reddest pearl in the ocean and the sweetest melody ever written. She was the greatest dancer and she has left a massive hole in our hearts, the world will be a darker place without her."
Paul Black later took to Facebook to write: "My life is on hold. Indefinitely. Thank you to all wishers. I'm a broken man."

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91-year-old grandma becomes oldest university graduate

A 91-year-old woman became the oldest person to graduate from university in Thailand on Wednesday, receiving her bachelor’s degree from King Maha Vajiralongkorn.

Escorted by her family, Kimlun Jinakul travelled more than 700 km from the northern province of Phayao to Sukhothai Thammathirat Open University, near Bangkok, to receive her bachelor’s degree in human ecology. “It has always been my dream to continue my studies,” Kimlun told local TV station Thai PBS. She said that she had finished junior high school but couldn’t continue her education at the time because her family couldn’t finance it.
Kimlun said: “When I was young, I actually received good grades. grandma1-300x200 “I have always enjoyed reading. I even bought manuals to educate myself so I could help my children with their homework.” Kimlun said she became inspired to continue her formal studies in 2011, once her children and grandchildren had received university educations and found decent jobs. “It’s never too late to study,” she said. “She is a very determined person,” said Bhum Juasiripakdee, one of Kimlun’s grandchildren. “We all support her while making sure she remains in good health.” The university said Kimlun had not received any special treatment in terms of grading. In fact, she failed half of her courses and had to retake examinations several times. “The university provided me with a lot of conveniences,” Kimlun said. “They allocated rooms on the ground floor for me so I did not have to climb the stairs.” The university is the first in Thailand to offer distance learning to elderly people. Almost 200 people older than 60 have enrolled.

How to even out an uneven skin tone

Everybody dreams of having super smooth and evenly-toned skin with a natural, sun kissed glow. Unfortunately, quite a few reasons can lead to uneven skin tone, which results in both an unhealthy and tired-looking complexion. The main causes for an uneven skin tone, also known as skin discoloration, are pigmentation, pimples, acne, injury or overexposure to sunlight. An individual can experience uneven skin tones (like dark or red spots) on legs, arms, back or even in their mouth area. Probably the most common case is the aftermath of a sun burn; if you stay in the sun unprotected for too long, your skin will be burned and even when it heals you will notice that your skin tone has become uneven. Even though there are countless skin products available for treatment, why not try your hand at some fantastic home remedies for uneven skin tone? Sometimes covering the effect with cream, foundation or makeup simply won’t help you treat the cause.   The ingredients for these do-it-yourself remedies are highly accessible and might already be in your refrigerator or pantry at home. No matter if you're light or dark skin or anywhere in between, we are certain that you will enjoy these neat home remedies. Learn how to apply them, try one out and make your own skin product to heal your uneven skin tone !

  1. Baking Soda
Our first recommendation for treating uneven skin tone is simple, yet extremely efficient. You are probably already familiar with the fact that baking soda is an excellent healthy solution for whitening teeth, so the fact that it helps you achieve gorgeous skin is almost natural. In the case of skin, baking soda acts as an exceptional bio exfoliator that does not damage your skin like other commercial products. It has the power to remove dry skin resulted by scarring or tanning and leaves you with a beautifully even skin tone. All you need is to make a paste of baking soda (approximately one teaspoon) and water and directly apply it to your body or face, leaving it for several minutes to set. Carefully rub the damaged area for around 3 minutes with the tips of your fingers and then wash the paste off with water.
  1. Aloe Vera
Aloe vera really is one of the founding fathers of home remedies. It’s a wonderful solution for a great number of problems and it heals the causes in a 100% natural way. As far as skin care is concerned, aloe vera is a wonderful moisturizer and can greatly aid you in getting rid of dark patches and obtaining a healthy and even skin tone. Particularly the gel extracted from leaves of aloe vera helps out, so you are going to need to extract it by cutting a leaf or more of aloe. After squeezing out the gel, you can directly apply it to the area you want to treat. Allow the gel to take action for around a half hour, rinsing it off with water afterwards. Repeating the process helps you achieve the best results, so make sure to use aloe vera gel often for an even skin tone.
  1. Orange
Aside from being a delightful source of Vitamin C and healthy to consume under numerous forms, oranges are also known for naturally lightening your skin tone. It comes packed with natural bleaching properties and can help you obtain the smooth and even skin you have been hoping for. To get this home remedy right, you are going to need some orange juice. You can obtain the juice by yourself by squeezing or juicing the orange. Cover the designated area with this juice right before going to sleep and let it set during the night. The following morning you normally wash it off, making sure to repeat the process.
  1. Oats
Baking soda is not the only natural ingredient you can use to exfoliate your skin in a healthy way. This will not only help you achieve a lovely and even skin tone, but it will also leave your skin silky smooth.  This home remedy works very well. Let it take action for around twenty minutes before rinsing with cold water. As you wash the oat. It is best to repeat this process every day until your skin tone becomes fully even.
  1. Honey
Honey is an awesome source of enzymes which allow you skin to have that healthy glow we were talking about in the introductory paragraph. This solution should work fine for sensitive skin, but if you want to use it as a pace pack, make sure you test it on a patch of skin beforehand. To nail this home remedy, take some honey and mix it with equal amounts of milk. Take the mixture and apply it to your face or body, allowing it to dry on its own. After it has fully dried, you can wash it off with lukewarm water. Practice makes perfect, so repeat often!
  1. Pawpaw
The fact that pawpaw is a delicious healthy treat is already well-known by most people. But did you know that it can help you solve your uneven skin tone problem? You might have guessed it as many skin care products contain pawpaw extract, but you should know that it’s fantastic for lightening skin, as well. Like in the case of oranges, pawpaw contains bleaching properties so you can enjoy glowing skin once again. You can either incorporate pawpaw into your diet for natural cleansing on a long-term period, or apply it directly to your skin. You can actually take a piece of raw pawpaw and rub the inside part on your skin, allowing it to dry on its own. Afterwards, wash the area with cool water and repeat every day for that natural glow.
  1. Sugar
Treat your skin to sweetness! Just like baking soda and oats, sugar acts as an incredible exfoliator for your skin, leaving you looking younger and better than ever. The possibilities are endless, so you can get creative, make your very own sugar scrub and enjoy velvety smooth skin afterwards. I guarantee you will absolutely love it.
  1. Cucumber
Isn’t it funny that almost all skincare product commercials or posters include a lovely lady with cucumbers over her eyes? Well you should know that there are plausible reasons behind it all! Cucumbers are amazing for skin, as they bind collagen and allow you to enjoy firmness and a light and even skin tone. You can use cucumbers to treat uneven skin tone, no matter what your skin type is.      

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Two pilots suspended for letting a 10-year-old fly a plane

This is a good example of not mixing business with pleasure. Two pilots working for Algeria's national airline have been suspended because they allowed a 10-year-old orphan to fly a domestic passenger aircraft.

The report says the boy's adventure was funded by a charity and filmed by El Bilad TV, who show him dressed for the occasion in a pilot's uniform and pushing buttons in the cockpit under supervision. It's however not clear how many passengers were on board the Air Algerie flight from the capital Algiers to the easter city of Setif but Algerian media outlets confirms that the pilots were suspended on July 29, 201 pending further investigation "because the act was a breach of civil aviation regulations".

Banker found murdered in Uganda, boyfriend on the run

Police is hunting for one Andrew Okoth after they discovered the body of his girl friend Fahima Natoolo, an employee of Tropical Bank of Africa, Kampala, Uganda.

According to Police sources, Natoolo, pictured with Okoth at an event on Saturday, July 29, was murdered on Sunday morning.

Police say that Okoth had asked her to spend a night with him at his home in Mbalwa Nabwojjo, a Kampala suburb.

The discovery of Natoolo’s body follows a missing person querry posted by a friend on Facebook on Saturday.

"They were last seen together at Red i Bar in Lugogo UMA Showgrounds on Saturday, nobody has seen or heard from them since,” Natoolo’s friend said.

Okoth's neighbor who allegedly witnessed the two fighting on Sunday morning gave directions to Natoolo’s family members who went with Police and upon breaking the door to his house, discovered the body in the house.

A murder case has been reported at Mbalwa Police Station.

More photos below.

by Linda Ikeji at 03/08/2017 12:16 PM
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US Bans Transgender People From The Military

Protests broke out on Wednesday night after Trump announced that transgender people will be banned from serving in the armed forces.
Hours following the announcement, hundreds of angry protesters took to the streets of New York, Washington DC, and San Francisco to show their displeasure. Crowds gathered at a plaza named after the late San Francisco gay rights activist Harvey Milk to protest Trump's ban. They also gathered at the Los Angeles LGBT Center in Hollywood, and also at the famed US Army Recruitment center in Times Square.
 
Demonstrators across the country held up signs bearing slogans. Words written on them include; "resist", "rise up", "Trans lives are not a burden". They can be heard chanting:  "Stand up! Fight back!" as they took to the streets.
Doug Thorogood and Nick Rondoletto, a gay couple from San Francisco, waved a rainbow flag and held a sign that read: "The only reason transgenders are being banned from the military is for bigotry."
"Haven't transgender people gone through enough? I'm over it!" Thorogood said.
Rondoletto added: "When (Trump) goes for the people with the least rights, I just can't sit back and let that happen."
Among the crowd gathered at the LGBT Center in Hollywood, Los Angeles, there was a US Army Reserve member and transgender man named Rudy Akbarian, 27. Rudy said at first he thought the news of the Trump's order was a joke. The five-year military veteran said he was "heartbroken" to learn it was real.
Another demonstrator, Yael Leberman, said transgender people "are completely adequate to serve" and combat is "not about physical, it's about mental" abilities.
Other protesters marched on foot outside the White House bearing signs which read: "We're here, we're queer, we hate the f****** president".
New York City Comptroller Scott Stringer was among those present at the protest on Wednesday. He addressed the crowd with a megaphone while poking fun at the president who he said had skipped enlisting to serve in the Vietnam war in the 1960s so that he could "hang out at Studio 54".
Actress Alyssa Milano was also among the protesters and she shared a photo from the demonstration on Instagram, telling her followers: "Trans rights are human rights. I was proud to support the LGBTQ community at the #NoTransBan rally."
Brenda Sue Falton, an Army veteran who was among the first women allowed entry to it and whose wedding at Cadet Chapel in 2012 was the first same sex marriage it has hosted, was also present.  Also at the protest was a transgender army veteran and Miss Peppermint, a famous New York City drag queen who appeared on the ninth series of RuPaul's Drag Race.
She addressed the crowd, saying: "It's not that they're afraid of us. You know what they're afraid of? That they're just like us."
Transgender veterans made direct appeals to the president to reconsider the controversial move.
More photos below.